Why your ‘love’ failed. No, seriously!

Life, Love

“I love you, and I always will”

Funny how these three little words have always either been the backbone and the foundation stone for many stories or they’ve just been the laughing stock of millions of us. It’s true, how the notions of love have the power to influence a few. Yet this influence can enhance or destroy our beliefs in a second. Light up the sky or darken up the colours. But filters of reality, theories, studies, statistics and subjugation of nothing but distraught clarity only affect us for the worse; Unless someone comes along, someone who starts defining everything you’ve ever created for the better, like a patronus charm used on the death eaters, these beliefs mixed up with the ‘wonders’ of our ego just lift us up and put us in the gutter.
Failed relationships. ‘Love hurts, it just has to!’, ‘Love causes only pain’, “Oh don’t waste your time, just have fun and chill”, “Don’t be so serious, we’re only having fun”; Words like these and sentences strung around and woven with lust and flutter –

Does that remind of anything? A broken record maybe? A plastic piece of junk, the disposed crumbled Styrofoam cup, that puddle of muck and such a world which’s stuck in a limbo. And the shit just keeps hitting you in your face until you finally either realise this isn’t really love, or begin questioning love itself, the word whose meaning your f*cked up piece of sh*t mind can’t just get right in its true meaning.

Yes, I’m talking about each and everyone of us here. We’ve been all there, yes. Stuck with wrong a*s people, together sh*tting on each and every thing that gets ‘thrown’ in our ways. It’s simply like this – Neither you, nor your ‘partner’ ever grasped what it really means to love. Does it pinch you? Oh you poor baby. F*cker. Slap yourself out of it before you not only will continue swimming in your own pile of miserable experiences, dying a suffocating death where even a wee bit air will seem like Nirvana.

Instead, all what you do all this while is build up notions and beliefs; based on the absolute horror of a guide which is our ego. You say it’s our personality.It’s ‘who you are’. Listen to me, you’re nothing but bullf*ckingsh*ting yourself.

What else has this peculiar though depressed a thought process to live your ‘life’ has ever brought you? Heart breaks? Betrayals? Oh she cheated on you. Well la di f*cking da.
Have you ever wondered instead of looking out for answers for what she did and what you did because of what she did to you, a very interesting (for the creative kinds of you) way of going about it would be to think(only because as jobless f*cktards as we are, who just love sitting and thnking all day) “What did I do to myself to go through an experience this macabre?” Only thing which comes to an average mind (yes, we all have been there, most of us still are) is another creation, another deathly foundation to more misery; Wrong belief system about relationships and love itself.

It’s the same thing with everyone to be honest. Every relationship, hook-up, affair, ‘thing’ which begins, beings on happiness. Everyone is happy. But soon, you begin tumbling down. Thing is, your life’s been so miserable without this one person that the happiness you get out of realising about them, being with them is alien to you. And you’re terrible as f*ck at even grasping this single fact. You’re just not capable enough to take up this energy upon you, and you crumble. You succumb to ‘darkness’, to misery. May is it love then, and simply put, you’re just not worthy of being able to hold it and hold yourself to be able to stand up under such immense enlightenment.

Until they all began going out with you and you called yourself a ‘thing’, were you not alright about each and every thing about them then? Everything was fine, and you ran after them. Chased them because you still wanted to be them. Until the moment arrives when you two become a couple.
And then, begins the rounds of ego bouts. ‘Let’s hit each other with all the force, all our ego and see who wins’. I hate competitions. It f*cks up the foundation of the thought how every one is equal and all are One.
Anyway, you pile up and throw sh*t at each other. Put your beliefs upon them. Force them, choke them and deep throat them. And then, you get bored. Why? Because they’re just not listening to you and doing as you like? Like? Hahaha! (What are we smoking seriously?)

Your likes matter, but to yourself. Which is why they are YOUR likes. It does not matter if they like the same school of thought. They’re not OBLIGED to you.
Oh and by the way, all this while mind you, you think and you’re so sure, so sure that you keep saying the same thing over and over again: “I love you”.

No. You don’t.

Love means surrender. You pick everything up that you have, wrap it around in a bubble wrap, and just hand it over to your partner. If you can’t do that and are not ready for it, or simply are just insecure and need a back up, an escape route, emergency exit, you’re NOT in love. Simple as that.
When you surrender, the forces protect you, because these forces in material form, in flesh and bones, are you! So basically, all this while, you’re keeping yourself protected by surrendering yourself. Whom do you surrender to, and why? Good question. Simply because the person in front of you is nothing you yourself. (Remember how everyone always ends up saying we all are the same, and then we go home and take a sh*t and flush every good thing that you just came home eating after?)
Love, then simply put,is everything that there is. Likes, dislikes, hurt, happiness, everything is self created. Whereas love, it just is. Perhaps an act where you are so kind and truthful to yourself that you don’t let even your own actions get the better of you and you protect yourself. When you do that, you only attract what you really are – Love itself! And when you come across someone who understands it, you don’t feel they’re anyone else. They’re just the exact replica of you. And you push towards more love, in all its truest forms!

Which is why there’s growth. You grow, and so does your partner. There’s a flow; remember how you just surrendered to this flow? If the flow stops, stagnation, boredom occurs. Doubts, misunderstandings, growth of ego takes place. It’s a dynamic thing, just like how galaxies evolve, we take birth and die, just how the time keeps passing by. Love, in itself, simply grows. Anything short, well my innocent ones, it’s just a dirty stinky lie.


The old leather jacket.


The roots stretch out, after being cut over and over again, ever succeeding in reminding the world about how futile it is to resist and perhaps to give in. The forces of the universes govern in such a fashion that every permutation, every combination, those random events which we shrug off and all of those things which put us to one simple question: Do we believe in magic?

I’ve always believed there’s some element that we all over look, no matter how hard we try to see. This element, entity, force, thought, belief, call it whatever you want to; It is hidden in the moment when a single drop of sweat traces the back of your neck as you get nervous, the light in your eyes when you see a loved one and all the goosebumps associated with it. How can we see it? Certainly an experience it is then, yes? Or perhaps the very fabric which this world is made up of, and we, material beings, look under our shiny microscopes and through our highly advanced telescopes,  trying to find it. Does it not bring you to a laughter when you realise it just cannot be something physical?

It’s the innocence in children’s eyes, and that girl who you just walked past by. It’s in us, and oh how dormant it stays unless we simply start believing in its existence. Look at her, as she smiles at me, after countless days spent reading her words, trying to find my own existence in them. And how beautifully they all fit, like a physics’ definition; every word having a meaning, an existence, a need for it to be there. It all fits. She’s still smiling, as I continue being that insane nut, hoping again how she’ll summon up all the magical words she always is searching for, and put up a pretty story to this very moment. She’s still smiling at me, mind you. There are forces at work here, magnetic, dark matter floating through this space, working about its own magic and creating the world as it passes by. They tell you the story, and like the perfect handwriting to mesmerise the reader’s experience, her smile fills up the world around me, and that’s it. Everything, right there. The past, human existence, dinosaurs, the bloody milky way; They’re all here, and you’re aware. That fucking smile assures, like that hand on your shoulder, like the air traffic controller’s voice in a distress situation for the flight crew. (That makes me wonder about MH370 somehow, fuck it)

We all have those notions, things we’ve always wanted to do. That inkling feeling of something new to do. We hold that wish tight, and unless we find it, we rarely give up. For these ideas, thoughts define us. They’ve made us what we are. Made me what I am, right now. And yet, falling on the tips of the pine leaves how the rain drops find a perfect place, it all fucking fits! This universe has been moving, doing its own magic. We, walking on the ground, stuck onto it, lost in our useless chores, always doing things and running around, never realise it. What we see, is pictures. In a world fucked up with selfies, still moments, we’ve all lost the sense how everything is always moving. They’re making and creating the world for us while we merely witness the change. And foolishly, like drunken buffoons, think we’re the ones responsible. Of course we are, but through our actions. It in no way should stop us and make us limit our awareness to the mess around, and instead, stop and simply look up at the sky. Lose ourselves in its grandeur and its own magic. It only will come before you, if you are looking for it, that too, with all the belief. No room for doubts and back ups, here. There’s no “But what if we’re wrong?” You have one job. One fucking job. And it is to have a belief system, and to stick to it with no doubts whatsoever. In a place of doubts, fear arises. And once that happens, it plagues and kills.

Why can a simple smile not have the magic about it that it can’t fix up things?

All these thoughts and a billions of lifetimes later, one does eventually realises and just ‘gets’ it. So don’t worry, if not now, maybe a few cycles of life and death later, we all will too. This world, this universe, works on magic. Hold this thought, I said to myself. Hold it dear, nestled tightly upon your chest, clenched between your arms, embraced right next to your heart. Hold this thought. And what do I see? This Universe works for me! I am creating my world as I go on, and simply laid upon this simple thought, everything simply works for me, and I sit back and enjoy as it unfolds upon me. The universe this way, through me, is learning a very tiny aspect of its own creation. It’s learning itself. Like those permutations, I am one. And so are you. Maybe someday this universe, she’ll smile down upon you too. And assure you, that it just all fits.

Doing Is Everything.


It’s an unfortunate event, in our lives when we lose faith in ourselves. We need to remind us still, we’re merely mortal beings. Mistakes happen, rectify them we should. Live our past, rejoice it, for where we are, we’re here because of it. But if you want a better day, kill off the slightest inclination towards the darkness. It’s really 24 hours that matter, honestly. We all have a chance to become better, stronger than what we’ve been. The only way though, is to redeem ourselves. Remember our dearest Phoenix, do you?

Fuck your words.

Your thoughts,

Invalid are your arguments,

opinions of all kind.

Your belief sucks, so does your faith;

I laugh at your trust,

the tyranny isn’t in vain.

If you want to see the day,

shed all the darkness behind.

Don’t live as if there’s a tomorrow,

unless you decide to




Before we begin this ride, grasp your belts. Be ready for failure still, for this ride is better experienced than read in miserable words, another failed human attempt to express themselves in the truest forms. All the Shakespeares and Tolstoys, their written wonders or just tales of spoken joys, none of the created illusions of an experienced soul can ever be laid down in words, take any langauge at that. And if you’re still persistent, be my forever welcomed guest.
As my beloved Pink Floyd plays in the background and sings songs about rebirths and a brand new day, this is really about beginnings. Changes. The ever succumbed wounds to which souls have even perished, and how they have found their place in this spectacular galactic staged drama known as this life. They’ve been here, where I stand today. And oh just years of yearning it builds its foundations upon, the glorious present which if you’re careful, in all its honest forms has always been here. Yet look back and you see the days dreamt away in afternoon naps and awakened nights. Full of horror and plights. Centuries of unawakened trust and milleniums of foul cries, all beyond and gone, I stand here now telling you that this place still is only as beautiful as you want to see it. We build our own nightmares.
In a missed heart beat that can forever clear your doubts about what lies beyond this point in time, your life can disappear forever too. Why not make of what you’ve got now? Lost in the tiny seconds that tick away while you’re busy noticing how ugly someone looks, lies the reality that basically sweeps you off by your feet that you fall flat faced on the floor, bleed and die. All the pain you burdened yourself with, experiences haunting you like bullets forever stuck inside you, disappears and you’re born again. Phoenix reminds you how that’s what you’re destined for, and you find your muse. You appreciate its presence, see the shiniest of lights. They take you home, while the trance that is this very creation of things material and beyond matter alike sways you away and you flow with it. The synchronized motions of limbs, the movements of the very atoms that make up air, all being controlled by a divine presence that aids all of the time and space. Divine, because it is flawless. Beyond measures of body, mind and matter, governed by forces that surround us and are the clockworkers playing with us jewels.
Trance continues. You’re lost. Yet aware of each breath that you take. This surely is love, and it’s divine. You see the stars, and they tell you tales. You hear them at nights, when with empty hearts and unfulfilled desires the yearning exposes itself onto you. Yet you smile, because you know all what exists, ever has and forever will continue to, is all here. And like jumpers between the planes of existence, you make the jump, and decide where you want to be. The senses deceive and like puppets, without a heart and a soul, dancing to the cacophony that surrounds, unaware and morbid, existed I have. Time and its continuum ever so gliding ahead, breaking the very laws within which we restrict ourselves, answered echoes of a calling I have. The joy within us which we live on our lives by without being aware of stays dormant and dead unless you break the laws. There lies a world beyond the one which we are so used to, a world full of love and no greed. Only truths, acceptances, yet heartbreaks over come by only the sense of love, the love which hides within us, a world so beautiful that you weep for hours. And yet the embrace, warmest of the geysers emerging from the very bosoms of the planet which we otherwise consider dead and a thing.
Within these embraces lies a land of hope, utter peace and the truest of homes.



“I believe in everything until it’s disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it’s in your mind. Who’s to say that dreams and nightmares aren’t as real as the here and now?”

They come true. They really do. One day you’re crashing into things, going unnoticed, clung on to vines infested by pest, scattered, diffused. And then, you find yourself dreaming. You wake up. Shrug your head. Pinch yourself. Go around your daily chores, always looking up at the skies, dazed, uncared about the simple fact that you do not know what you’re looking for. But you’re searching. You know something’s there. Something beautiful. Some random bliss, perhaps? No. Guess not. You’re looking for a dream. You’re still searching for it. It’s not a reality yet. Slap yourself. Bang your head on the wall until it hurts. Crash on your bed. Cry. As the months on the calendar pass you by. You’re alive. You’re grateful. You watch your step, yet you do not care anymore. You know nothing’s worth it, but you’re wrong. You must be, you know it too.

In a world full of scars, tears and notions of what nots, you feel out of place. Something’s not right. Is this life, or just a glimpse of a bigger reality? You’re definitely wrong. Unassuming, you move on. Linger, as time goes on and likewise you do too. It’s been a while, but you feel home. Has the time passed by? You’re tired. You need water as your throat clings onto the last bit of your bitter bile juice. You’re thirsty. Are you here? Look around, touch, feel and smell. It surely feels different. You begin to wonder what dimension you’re occupying right now. Things are changing. Ideas, beliefs are too. There’s a new world order in progression, and you’re a part of it. You’re responsible now, you feel the burden of thousands of restless souls who’ve not yet whispered their prayers, because they don’t know how to. They’re lost. You’re their hope. You’re their calling. There are greater things and forces at work now, and you’re merely a puppet. A mere witness, who can do nothing but just surrender, because any struggle will cause pain. Pain you despise. You’ve yearned for a change, you’ve worn the scars, you’ve seen freedom through them. But you linger on. You’re tough. People stare, they know not their ideas of you are wrong. They feel they can see you. Have the rights to talk about you. You’re their muse. They’re liars. Puppets like you, sure, yet only weaker, mortal physical beasts of burden, sickened by their very egos. They still stare. You stare back. You laugh, they flinch. Blinded, sleeping heavy pieces of bones and flesh, occupying space and time, polluting, excreting their opinions, unscathed by a simple fact that they are wrong.

But this, this is your dream. You’re the narrator, the actor, the very centre of attention. You’re the hero. The best part is, it becomes of what you believe in. You want happiness, you get bluest of skies full of popcorn clouds, sunlight beaming through them, yet it isn’t warm. It’s breezy, and you feel your hair blow upon your face. You’re happy. You smile. You shed a tear, and submerge in joy. Life is what you make of it, even if it’s a dream to you. You really can hit the F5. Yet where you land up next is a random roll of a dice. So do you real want to wake up? Or maybe your dream is your utter reality. Open your eyes, shut them even if you want to. It matters not. For you are beyond what you see, feel, experience. You’re beyond this realm, existing in parallel realities. You are looking down upon yourself and you’re happy. You’ve made mistakes, horrible ones at that. But you’ve learned from them. From waking up in the middle of the nights, spending in utter disguise of having slept actually, you’ve been terrible before. You’ve sat there wondering when these nightmares would end. You’ve sung songs, hummed them on your bike rides, sheltered in them when the times were hard to go by.

It really matters not where you come from. Your dream, it takes you places. You’re always going. To a better future. A better job. A good marriage. A new car. You want to travel. See places. What keeps you from being in all of those places? It’s you, yourself. You wake up, you know it was a dream. You don’t believe in them. Been a fool, always looking for ways to turn out to be cool. Look where you are. You’re stuck. You have plans. Oh yes you do. But life is happening around you, and you, blinded by your thoughts while you try so desperately to take time out for your own needs and not wants, you let it go unnoticed. Believe in things. These, your dreams, are your tools to carve the future as you go along. But, do not worry about it. Live here, in present. Dream, dream big. Because even when it’s those horrific nights with nightmares, you know there’s a way out. And it’s looking down upon you, waiting for it to be found by you. Your dreams are your bliss, your joy and your happiest treasures. Go find them. And when you do, you will get reassurances, in every single step you take. Reassurances, that you’ve been on the right path all along. It’s always working towards one singularity, and you’re a part of it. Everything around you carves you, as you carve the very things that surround you. You’re infinite in these moments, and the very forces that have created you now protect you. You know they do. And when such things happen, you find yourself lofted upon a hilltop, looking around knowing everything is the very soul of you. The mountains, the valley below, the tiny red dots of the tail lights of distant vehicles whose sounds may not reach to you, but the very pulsating pistons, moving in synchrony with time, the very heartbeats of yours in a perfect unison, these things that occupy space in this universe, and beyond, is all you. And you’re responsible now, for your dreams now have led to your very liberation; and all of which lies in the very thought, the single choice you made to start believing in your dreams.


Awakening, Life

“Follow me down to the valley below
You know, the moonlight is bleeding from out of your soul”

As I sit here, in an absolute admiration, unerring awe of every moment that passes me by, all I feel is this undiluted, unmitigated love for you. Because its in you that I see myself. All my fears. All my worries. All my laughters, tears, falls, victories, achievements and each and every moment that I’ve sat here, bewildered if there’s an end to this seemingly endless sorrow that plagues our world. It’s in you that I find the courage to carry on. Hope. And dream. You after all, the very construct of my world. The world as I see it, experience it in each breath that I take. Each wrong turn that I make. Every summer when I sweat and every winter when I shed my old skin and take rebirth. Rejoice. It’s my world after all.

The very strain of this world is embedded with this very love that I speak so highly of. I’ve experienced it. I’ve wanted to express it, when I saw you curl up into a ball and cry. When you sit by the window and watch the world go by. In every heart break that you put through, in every grain of sand that moulds you. Those long, empty hearted walks on a dark, cold, november night, When your walk had been too long and the sun shone above your head, lambent up high. The rainy nights when you’ve achhoo’d, in every judgment you mistook. I’ve been there. Witnessing it, watching my self unfold through you. I love you. I always have. We share the same fate, do we not? We’ve materialised our souls into this world, at the same time, to work together for our growth. To rescue ourselves. From ourselves. Through our very selves. It’s why we’re here. In this very time. Together, existing, getting reborn in every second. Because all what’s there in this world, in this universe and in this very physical, material creation, is this very moment.

There IS no past. There’s no future. It’s all but a construct of our minds, the way we’ve perceived our experiences, how we’ve understood them. And how we can expect them to be like, depending on our very actions. It’s nothing in there but pain and misery, because our actions themselves haven’t been up to the mark. Do you feel the guilt? You see the moments you’ve lied flash before you. Times when you’ve stolen something. The truth, from someone. Love, too. When you haven’t shared how much pain you’re in, how you wanted the time to just pass by. When your dreams ceased to materialise. Cried, a lot, haven’t you? It’s funny how we all share similar themed events which just take place in different times in our lives. Because in all these parts we’ve lived within each other. Experienced the world in the same way, however briefly. Because it’s our world that we share after all. Why must it all yet be different in the end? We weren’t born at the same time. Neither will we die. But these moments, which have faith in our souls, recreate us, give birth to us and reassure us in a peculiar way, that it all seems very comforting; That we’re here now. And we must work together. Embody each other, engulf in an eternal, just, endless, truthful, faithful love. Ever so working for each other, through each other because we MUST realise that all these moments have put faith in us, that we’d work exactly the way it all does. Through these forces that are beyond our comprehension, forces that give us courage, faith and an everlasting sense of happiness when we work for each other.

Sit, one day, at notice someone in an endless pain. Look at Mrs. Drudgers. Her husband’s left her. Her kid gets bullied at school and the teachers don’t help either. Her sister’s married to a hotelier in Hawaii, and hasn’t called ever since she got married. The employers don’t pay enough to live through a winter without having the heater bills over due three times. Observe how she sits at the fireplace which hasn’t been lit since forever, staring blankly at the charred, broken tiles at the back and wonder how her life’s turned out the same way. Wouldn’t you want to just hug her and hold her hand, reassuring how you’re here now? Let’s walk a bit. Let’s breathe. But wait. Here’s little Tim. He’s 13. He hasn’t seen his dad. Ever. His little brother can barely talk. His mother, Mrs. Bates, slogs 10 hours at a cloth factory to barely provide her kids 5 days’ meal. Her husband went out to get milk one night and never returned. They learnt he was stabbed 18 times that night. But Tim, he’s a strong lad. He comforts her mother, he sees and connects with the same pain. He bites his lips so hard sometimes that they bleed, for he mustn’t shed a tear. He’s strong, he knows. He likes to read though. But he’s just one book. Never has he had enough money to buy one. He gets his pocket money though, yet he puts it in his piggy bank, to save for his brother’s treatment. He sits in the playground at school, near the cherry tree, while the other kids play football. He sits, he cries. Here he can, no one’s watching him.

You relate to these events. It makes you wonder of all what seems like injustice in this world. But would you rather sit and continue to wonder without arriving anywhere, or get up and take little Tim to his favourite football club’s match and buy him ice cream? It’s in our very nature to love, because we connect. We’re here, bridged and sewn together in every tiny second, being mere puppets, dancing to the tunes of the very source that governs us, governs all eternity. You and I are the same thought, idea, just expressed in different ways. In order to be perfect, everything must cater to the better resolve of this very creation, every deed done in harmonious way. Through love. Through its own self. Why must we be any different? Well, we can. But then we’ll perish, like everything that has failed to understand this very thought. It is this perishing force which allows our egos to act instead let our very core soul take control. It is then we begin focusing on the outcomes instead of the very force which creates. We lose sight of our actions, we hurt each other. Individualise. Don’t let your ego take a hold of you. It’s not your true nature, which is of eternal and unbound love and acceptance of each other. It’s this acceptance of each other which contributes towards, and enhances this pious grand scheme. After all, through this very oneness do we Evolve. And isn’t evolution the very way everything works? The very world that we share evolves in every breath of ours. It would cease to exist the moment there’s no exhale to your inhale. Love, would you rather not then? Be mesmerised, and yet constantly materialise into a better being, experience this love through the act of loving itself? It’s a beautiful world that we’ve got, only love feeds its soul. Let it Evolve.



“Faith is not the clinging to a shrine but an endless pilgrimage of the heart”

Hello beautiful. Yes you. The traveller. Wanderer. You’ve arrived here, your odyssey lasting all the years you’ve walked this planet, ever experiencing and learning. Evolving each moment in time. Yet here you are, with an unannounced, hidden faith that you probably are unaware of, in events, lending your ears to someone you weren’t even aware of until now. What do you seek? What do you expect? Is it not the insentient yet truest of faiths of experiencing something which somehow brings you any degree of peace? Do you seek to connect? Faith, as they say, finds a way to work about its mysteries. So hang on, hold tight. You might like this trek.

Have you noticed every breath that you take? How you tuck yourself in every night, heeding yourself to distant dreams, knowing, having faith, and in all awareness, that you’ll see the next morning? How you overcome every heartbreaks eventually, maybe reasoning with yourself that time would heal everything?  Absolute faith, in all its glory, is hidden in that tiny fragment of time when you’re just about to make a choice and stick to it, abide by it, function within its parameters and its scope; Or through submit yourself to natural course, believing with all your heart in hands that attempt to reach out to you. Such God-like belief though is beyond the realm of the five senses. You can’t see it. Neither can you smell, taste, touch or hear it. It’s ruled by your true self, your soul in a very different dimension, so that your perceptive reality and influence of your five senses cannot hinder its evolution. Or death. It comes naturally, effortlessly. It’s built in the

When you seek physical, material pleasures, becomes easy to lose faith it does. For you believe in things which end up disappointing you. Breaking you apart. Tearing you into pieces, pieces that you cannot recognise. You lose yourself. Wonder about how miserable times have become. This misery causes the ever diminishing belief in yourself to overcome all pain that hold you back, cease your liberation. And why not. You eventually exist as matter, in this world made up ‘things’ having a beginning and an end. Why mustn’t the happiness gathered through relationships, achievements, success end in a gloom too? It is this misery that tests your belief system. Why mustn’t your true character, the very learning of your soul go through this onerous path? See how the trek turns and bends, makes you climb and drenches you in sweat? It was never meant to be easy. Had the otherwise been the case, you and I both would be living in a world bathing in love, honour, respect, oneness for one another?

Our choices hence come into the panorama. Can you hear yourself breathe right now? Notice how you’ve always been breathing this way ever since your began existing not as merely a consciousness but a physical being? How infinite it seems? Yet how delicate. You have a choice. You can pick yourself up, walk out to the balcony and end this misery, at least the one associated with this physical world? You always have a choice. Yet you live on. Why? What are you waiting for? Do you expect it to change? You do. Don’t you? So much faith, in something you’ve no consciousness of? Why? This unanswerable question, this single though defines the truest nature of absolute faith. You know it’d change. It’s bound to. It’s always been ever changing. So will this. Learn from your past, do you not? Learn. Yearn, but for higher sense of your own self. Of your soul. The sublime entity that is You. Believe. You’re strong. Pain doesn’t affect you. You smile. Because you now know it’s the only way you’ll ever redeem yourself. The faith you’re supposed to be aware of lies in the very core of you. It’s the motor sense that shakes you up and tells you “Hey you absolute darling of a being, you can choose to cry, try to live by, wait, cease to grow or you can realise how what seems like agony is veritably your rebirth. Liberation from your pain body. Awareness of the higher reality; This desolation is the very plan, the plan to make you understand that every event that takes place in association with you is inevitably the way it’s bound to take place. It is your choice then which transforms your self consciousness into that of higher awareness. People, when they realise this, would display absolute faith in every experience they undergo. Every other person that they meet, how they treat and greet, hence turns out to be part of the same plan, the bigger picture.

Remember the magic of togetherness? How little pieces when brought together solve most bewildering of puzzles? Absolute faith brings our consciousness at par with that of others, enabling us to work for the greater good. It makes you stand up every time you fall. Because once learning ends, actions begin. Every action, thus is of unadulterated brilliance, in unison with the creation itself, of liberation and freedom from all time and space. You elevate. Evolve. Perish all your sorrows, physical pain, miseries of the past and worries of the future then. You arrive here. In present. Without much regard to the past, without any concern of the unseen future. Believe in what’s here, right now. Never forget the simple act of never doubting your own self, never blaming the predicament, yet smiling in all your silliness, in awe and absolute romance with the creation itself. Your heart yearns, for it knows without faith, even love doesn’t stand a chance. Without love, your constant yearned Peace becomes an alien concept. Reach for the state where convictions precede actions. For then every fall brings a smile on your face instead of the darkness which’d rather surround you and eventually cause your annihilation.

“There is no despair so absolute as that which comes with the first moments of our first great sorrow, when we have not yet known what it is to have suffered and be healed, to have despaired and have recovered hope and faith.”



“Why do we fall, Bruce?” “So that we can can learn to pick ourselves up.”

You’re wrong, Mr. Wayne. We fall, but only to realise it’s us who has to stand up, all by ourselves, on our very own, through learning, realising our truest potentials, intentions and character. The learning is what liberates you. The awareness of yourself Even the very attempt counts as much. And this simple realisation doesn’t come easy. First we fall, then we look around. We cry, we wail. We nag, scream, beg for help. But who do we wait for? Someone to offer us a hand? Sure. In a perfect world which for now remains a dream. We do not find anyone who in the purest of intentions wants to help, without expecting anything in return. We’re never meant to. Notice how they fail you? Ridden by their greed, hunger ruled by a false ego which burns and eats you within? Do you understand? Do you see it? Experienced this you have. Haven’t you? Haven’t you sat looking out in distance while flashes from memories you comprehend, blind you and take you away while you, like lunatic, mad being, ride along wondering how times have changed? In the name of an offering hand only pain, misery ridden with guilt and ego have come to your respite. Oh what respite call it you can? You’re here. In this moment. And this is what exists right now. If you fall today, you know to stand up on your own. But how? Through experiences. Experiences happening in then present reality, mere lessons worth learning have the become now. Fall, but stand up on your own. There is no help unless you’re a blessed child.

You make excuses. You try reasoning with yourself. You say the times have changed. You say sometimes people do too. But do they? People never change. How they respond to your presence is where the constant change lies at. Time never changes too. It’s all here. In this moment. It’s around you. Around me. It’s built in this very fabric of our Universe, how can it then change? What changes is the way we see this world. It’s constantly changing, isn’t it? Shifting, turning, going places. It moves with you. It sticks to you. It is you. It is the way you see yourself, a reflection of your understanding of your own self. It is the very perception of your own self and it is the reflection of what you comprehend from your experiences which ever so constantly, with each moment of passed time morphs you as a whole, in or out of sync with the bigger reality. This is what you call change. The metamorphosis. Like a snake which moults, like a deed which fruits. Wouldn’t you wear a better skin now? How would you get it though? Thought about it, have you? You change the way you look at things. You transform. Rule your mind and guide it to reflect what’s already within you. A world full of magnificent, infinite love. This simple thought works magic. Oh yes. The put-your-thoughts-in-a-cradle-turn-you-into-a-kid-all-over-again maddening, ludicrous circus that is your true nature, reveals itself through your actions, through this creation around you in such a way the very world around you morphs itself, by itself, at a blink of an eye. It is then the life you live blesses you, and your world. You notice coincidences. You realise how unindividualistic our efforts need to be. The very core of your soul speaks in the same tongue as mine. As others’. You understand it. You respond to it without having any need to use spoken words. Isn’t the silence shared by a few most beautiful of experiences? It provides warmth. Comfort. Would you not change how you perceive this reality then? Shift your focus. Realise who you are. And the only way you’d achieve it is  when you become transient. Elevate yourself. Think. Isn’t it what you do anyway? Think? Over and over again? Lost in time living the miseries of memories you’d rather liquidate forever? Rise, dear child. Shed your skin and breathe free.

Every attempt to sit and ponder over the times that have gone by, being worried about how the storms would eradicate you or the sun would shine in the coming times, would result in pain. More misery. Suffering. You being wondering how any action of the past would have resulted in the present that’d perhaps be different. Foolish thoughts, games that your mind plays over you and your false perception of the time that’s passing by right now begin molesting the soul which you really are. It is being in this moment, ever changing and creating through the world around you and in sync, which turns out to be the ulterior, truest reflection of your core self. The metamorphosis. You as a soul being henceforth knows the honest, virile, fertile, virgin reality. It understands. It observes, and reflects through your actions. You see it in people around you. You connect. You realise untapped potential for love, brotherhood, harmony, compassion and partnership. The world around you changes. You smile. You blush. You feel blessed. You understand how every action being taken by you has the potential to change everything for better, influence people and gradually begin the long yet glorious walk towards oneness. The perfect world. Our dream.

It all seems like the perfect winter day, snowy peaks and the bright, warm Sun. Yet, it isn’t. All it is right now is a world full of disgusting, adherent, negativity which on a Summer day would turn out to be hot air laden with humidity. You feel the shirt stick onto your sweaty back, while your broken, dry lips mercifully await the monsoon rain? In a world full of hatred and the usual cacophony, you feel left out. Isolated. Wasted. You see your energies disperse, pushing you towards the boundaries of unsustainability. Alone, wondering where to start picking up pieces of your life which you see is getting wasted over trivial chores the society unfortunately has created and made mandatory, you begin losing out on your present. This is where your mind disperses and thus begins your downfall. You experience nothing but an endless dive, as people watch on by, whispering in the plastic ears incapable of expressing their true selves. Rise you must, and alone. For you’ve fallen alone too, while the world shifted around you. Yet, a hope remains. Blessed are those who find themselves but falling, yet together with more, desperately trying to grasp and hold on to while the world still shifts around. In that moment, you lose the sense of time. These blessed souls only exist so they can experience this infinitesimal moment in time, time yet unbounded, prodigious and infinite in all its existence. Because it’s all here. It’s in that tiny moment they get in conversance with all the vastness of all creation. Unfathomed love the poets would call it. Because it is in this moment the souls realise what existence is all about. And how through our individual efforts towards each other brings about a sense of reality to the otherwise dreamt world. Through individual actions and self help do we find love, and learn how it’s about dedicating your complete existence, in all time, to one another. Perhaps then we’d experience the real form of salvation and liberation.

So fall. But don’t look around. Help yourself. Maybe through this attempt of self liberation would others begin wondering about themselves too. Maybe you’ll learn there’s no one to help you, and changing how you perceive yourself in those dark times would liberate you. Maybe in the dark you’ll smash yourself against another lost soul, eager to find light. Oh to their delight and to yours too, would you together find a way to help each other out. Maybe they’ll instead try pushing you down, choking you, suffocating you, but lose the fight must you not. You know they’re lost too, desperate, unaware and blind. They’re weak. But their surviving chances are bleak, unless they change too. It’s all around you. The change, in perception, through actions, projected as the world around us. Mustn’t you change too? If there’s a dark, there’ll be light. Yet it won’t shine bright unless you open your eyes and see. Realise. Change. Because it’s the only thing constant anyway when you deal with Creation. If you wall, stand up. Only through these falls, dark times would you find your true self.

“Why must we fall, Bruce?” “So that we can learn to pick ourselves up regardless of how things change around us. So that we can help ourselves. Hence Others around us. Isn’t it what we all want within our hearts, Father? A perfect world, within us and hence all around us?” “You’ve grown, Bruce. Now I know if you’re out there, even when the world around you comes crashing down, when all hopes fail and it’s night all around, you’ll stand up on your own.”

The inception

Awakening, Life

Dwelling on the past.
Worried about the future.
Tensed in present.
And oh how reassuringly you say you’re alive.

The existence in heart beats if you measure, why not ridden on bed, asleep throughout your life would you call being alive?

Measure yourself, but in present. Each breath coming out of your lips when you heave a sigh, every flicker of an eye as the time passes by, stay alive. And feel the grace of being alive. Isn’t that enough to bring you to a smile? Why O’ child, then would you cry? Lost in the memories of the world passed by?

I need you alive. I want you alive. Living, breathing, dancing, cherishing in all your glory, the very you behold within your troubled mind. For what it’d bring, would be an overwhelming sense of denouement. The ultimate truth. Your precious purpose. Funny part is that there is no secret to it. Be like the cow silently and with utter patience which grazes over the green pastures. Unbothered, about how much time has passed. Omnipresent. She’s here. You can be too. Oh, wait. There but is a secret. Well, not to those who followed beloved Dr. Einstein closely. Time is merely a cage our minds have constructed around us, limiting our very existence. Infinite wisdom and higher energies are beyond the realms of our petty minds. Limited is what we all are. Time hence merely defines these boundaries within which we must carry our chores before we go. Go. “Oh but where?” you’d ask. And why would you not? Go beyond these boundaries. Liberate..

Resonate with me. Together, works magic. Tiny little thing, a carbon atom for example, isn’t capable enough to even dream about a world. Let alone a world where Life would evolve. Is it conscious? Yes. Embedded within it is a strict code. Of togetherness. The amber hue which wakes you up in your room has its origins unfathomable miles away. The very source of Light, our little Sun. Embedded within it is the same code of togetherness too! Like the carbon atom, hydrogen atoms come together and create energy, the very source of your natural morning alarm. Life just glows as it bathes in the golden hue of the morning Sun, doesn’t it? But our hydrogen doesn’t stop there. It yet comes together with our never forgotten carbon and plants the seeds of Life. Look how these two created the world around us, created me and created you. Alike, similar, convergent, uniting and specks of dust are we. Why not together we all must then be? In harmony, with love and guilt free?

Hold on. Breathe. Come back. Look around. In accord forget you can, we have ceased to exist in the same space and time. Spaces are physical. Worry about it must you not. But time is a cruel, misery filled, haunting of a concept. Unless we both are here, together, in resonance, in tune, coupled, hinged and bridged, dreaming about a place in this world which’d be your Home would be all too foolish an ask. Present you need to be. Here. Hands held, lips pursed and hearts pounding, while time emanates by, within ourselves we’ll find happiest of Homes, hopes and dreams, treasured Universes where times freeze. Liberate shall we be, like those cows, grazing on a hilltop merrily. The truth reveals itself, not through a spectacle, never through a debacle but through you it finds itself. You are the truth. There’s no better evidence of Life being the most beautiful thing to ever happen through consciousness than you yourself. You are the ultimate. You are the truth. Find yourself, by being here. Existing in every word that comes out of your mouth, in every dream which elevates your tertiary senses when you sleep, through every tear you weep. For only Present negates the need of a world with time reining it. Every action becomes effortless and righteousness becomes your default virtue. Call it liberation would you not, when you and I unite as one, grow consciously, to a higher realm? Only as one do we Evolve.

Synchronise. Hold my hand and take the dive. Close your eyes. You don’t need to see where you’re heading to. The very origin of the thought of taking the plunge comes to our minds effortlessly. It is the gut feeling which reveals our true selves. Would you trust your own self then? Doubt kills you.

Be here. Still. Ride the wave of time. Make it your puppet. Be the mistress. Latent. Hear your breaths? Ride them with me. Be quiescent. Notice the stillness around you. Notice me noticing you. Observing you. I’ve always been here. You’ve too. We existed in all time. Are you aware of me now? Let your words out. Notice how the space around us creates the perfect place for your words to fit in. To make them aware. Stay still. Calm down. Relax. Take a deep breath. Feel the warmth as I engulf you. Shield you. Yet like a balloon when filled with air, allow you to grow. Should be the very nature of every soul, every mind and every body on this planet to provide for one another. This is how we grow. This is how we evolve. Together. It all works magic.